Thoughts of a Murderer
by bloodyrose1294
Summary: How did Sakura decide that she needed to end Sasuke's life? My musings on what was going through her mind at the time.


**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto much to my ever lasting dismay.

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**_Thoughts of a Murderer_**

"I have to do this," she whispered to the sky.

Sakura Haruno tugs at her short pink hair in frustration. Piercing emerald eyes survey the small clearing that her group has decided to inhabit for the night. Scrutinizing the dark forest surrounding them for enemies, she concludes there is no threat lurked in the shadows. With this thought in mind, Sakura loses herself to her notorious internal argument regarding the love of her life, Sasuke.

When she was younger, her affections for the boy had been fleeting, a little girl's first love. However, as the years flew by, her feelings only seemed to grow. They bore fruit; blossoming deep within her soul, and only making this mission that much more difficult. Konoha expects its shinobi to eliminate Sasuke now that he threatens the tranquility of their world. Her resolve to either protect her beloved city, or save her ex-team mate was being tested.

Her heart screams for her to damn the consequences and save her beloved, but her mind rationally states that hunting the avenger down and killing him in cold blood is the right thing to do. It is the classic fight between logic and the feelings of the heart. Affection cannot rule the life of a shinobi, for they themselves or some other unfortunate individual will pay the price with their blood staining the cold, hard ground.

Sakura knows she cannot give into what she feels in her soul is right; logic must be followed. The turmoil within her is exactly why she avoided telling Naruto the truth. He will be angry with her later for not saying anything, but she cannot bear to be the one to inflict more anguish on him again. No, his blissfulness is a gift in disguise from her. She knew that if she had told him, he would most likely not listen to reason anyway. Naruto would go charging after Sasuke because of the stupid promise she had asked him to swear upon years ago.

She is no longer weak little girl. Over the past few years, the kinochi had proven to herself and everyone else that she could stand on her own two feet. Gone was the girl who cried over her teammate's fall into darkness. Gone was the one who tried in vain to keep a boy safe within Konoha's walls. Gone was the girl who was dependent on others. This Sakura emerged as a strong leader for her people.

She had locked away her affections for Sasuke, only to have them come back now and bite her in the ass. Although these intense feeling of her heart strive to reign supreme, Sakura cannot allow that to happen. She is a Kinochi. Kinochi do not yield to the wants of the heart, but only bend willingly for the village they serve. This notion was carved into their very souls. Sakura knows what she will do for her village.

If she lets Sasuke live, who knows how many lives will be sacrificed for his personal ambitions. His obvious immersion into all things evil makes the logic of her mind shine brightly. She must give up her feelings for him to bring order to this chaotic world.

The young girl looks up to the sky as she comes to this revelation. The moonlight shines gently against the lightening tones of the sky, giving one false pretenses of hope for a miracle. She heaves a heavy sigh. It has been awhile since she allowed herself the luxury of pondering without reason to dictate her. After dedicating her life to the way of the ninja, all frivolous thoughts had been sealed away.

Seeing the ever growing light in the sky wrestle with the darkness, she cannot help but be reminded of the relationship between the dark Uchiha and herself. What would have happened if Sasuke had never gone off to seek power? The girl snorted. For starters, she would not be standing in this small field preparing her mind for the death of a beloved person. Team 7 might have never fallen apart. Naruto probably would have trained along side Sasuke to defeat his brother, Itachi. They all would have grown stronger, together.

Maybe she and Sasuke might have had a romantic relationship. That is if he had ever returned her one-sided affections, and possibly fallen in love with her. They could have gotten married, had many black haired, green-eyed children, and grown old together as the years passed by. Sakura allowed these dreams to drown her conscious as they played out in her mind.

"Sakura!"

The spell was broken. Jade eyes revealed themselves to the world once more, squinting against the light that illuminated the small clearing. She took a deep breath to steel herself before replying, "Let's move out."

Grabbing her cloak that was lying at the foot of a tree before standing in front of her team, Sakura let her eyes roam over to where Kiba was standing, questioning him with her vibrant eyes.

Kiba answered her unspoken question; "I have a lock on his scent. He's very close."

She gave a slight nod that said, "Lead the way."

The team silently disappeared into the surrounding forest. Sakura never looked back.

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**A/N: **_Meh. After I wrote this, I found it a little depressing. Then I realized... who cares? Review, please. _


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